Can i not drive my cunt home
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
