who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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