I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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