Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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