i think i scared a bird with my dick
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
That accounts for only three of the penises
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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