can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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