I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
