Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
