I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
