I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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