Cold hands, warm shart.
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
