The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
