Plan B is the new Plan A
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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