69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
God I need to hump something, right now.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
