operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Randomize
