Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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