I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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