I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
my poor anus
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
