so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
