Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize