Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
May the power of my ass compel you!!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Randomize
