Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
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