You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
