Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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