yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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