Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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