I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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