Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
whose parrot is this?
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Randomize
