alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
