So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize