Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
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