I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Welp...herpes.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I think I sprained my soul last night
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
