Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
