btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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