So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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