He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
