The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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