he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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