i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
