She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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