he puts the penis in happiness.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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