They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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