So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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