Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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