Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
