Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
