he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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