i really wish james franco would like my vagina
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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