She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
