I'm laying in your front yard are you home
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
