In the future we'll all be gay
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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