i just made my gag reflex go away.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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