can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize