This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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